Being in Integrity
With reflection to grow and invocation to shine.
For a few years now, my private coaching clients have received Monday Momentum messages via text from me.
And, on days when I struggle to write, I wonder…what is it about the brain-to-mouth channel that can be easier and more open than the conduit of brain-to-fingers?
Today is one of those days.
My brain-to-fingers feels stuck.
But, the audio flowed brain-to-mouth this week.
Feel free to listen or to read. The words are different but the gist is the same.
One of the reasons I love coaching is because I love my clients.
I love their minds.
They are sharp and empathetic.
Soft and fierce.
They hold paradox and paradigm.
And, they hunger for growth.
They are expansion-in-motion.
And, they bring me what they see and know — and together we watch it metamorphosize in our safe growth-space created with bits and bytes and commitment to safely explore.
We hold what they bring to the light. Instantly it reflects something new when they say it aloud.
It’s because the reflection and refraction, the new ways of seeing, the saying and the hearing…create something fresh and different.
By the end of our time together, their ‘next step’ is one they wouldn’t have decided alone.
And, it’s their insight, their course, their path…not mine…that makes it all possible.
In the past couple of days, several coaching topics brought by clients have woven threads leading to an examination of the concept of integrity.
Integrity is one of those words like “authenticity” that gets thrown around.
According to the Oxford English Dictionary, there are actually four definitions for integrity.
The first is the quality of being honest and having strong moral principles, moral uprightness. Similar terms are honesty, rectitude, honor, honorableness.
The second is the state of being whole and undivided. Other words that are associated with this definition include unity, wholeness, coherence, cohesion, undividedness.
The third is the condition of being unified, unimpaired, or sound in construction, sturdiness, robustness, strength.
It got me thinking — how might these definitions relate to the decisions that you are asked to make on a daily basis and the way that you show up as leaders in your own domain?
Integrity and wholeness.
Unity with one’s self.
Honor.
A being that is unimpaired.
The definitions made it clear: integrity is necessary to be trusted — by ourselves and by others.
I'm reading a book right now called The Understory. It's a real backstory about how I found the understory. (And it begins and ends with Substack and
).
The underlying theme of The Understory is allowing nature, namely, the forest under the canopy of trees, to teach us about living rooted in a complex ecosystem.
There is a quote in the book from author Douglas Wood. He’s referring to a pine tree.
“In its silence, it speaks of a wholeness, an integrity that comes from being what you are.”
Our world constantly asks us to be someone different.
Often, it asks us to conform to an image, a group, or a collective story.
It can happen through a piece of feedback.
Or, a corporate culture that's pulling you into behaviors, practices and mindsets.
Via a friendship or relationship that, like gravity, molds you as it pulls you.
The asking of the world doesn’t mean we accept.
Our integrity allows us to root down and rise up.
And, when we’re challenged to decide between being whole or being divided, it’s a worthy place to spend some time.
Because often we don’t know what our wholeness is or the words to describe it until we’re invited to turn away from it.
That’s why this week’s invitation and invocation prompts you to pause to uncover what it is that makes you sturdy and strong.
What it is to be in your integrity.
An invitation to reflect
Pause for a moment and reflect on what “to be whole” means to you. Reflect on how being whole allows you to be sturdy, allows you to be trusted, allows you to be solid, yet able to withstand the storms.
Consider what that word “integrity” means to you.
Describe where you have integrity, and where you don’t. (Hint: this might be where you find yourself uncompromising vs. where you seem to say ‘yes’ when you mean ‘no’)
If someone were to observe you for a day, what behaviors would they see when you are “in integrity” vs. “out of integrity”?
Invocation
Beloved,
Behold your strength. It is mighty.
When you pull together the pieces of you, scattered and pulled to be something that you are not, you stand whole and you are strong.
Calling all the voices of you, versions of you, and impressions of you into one truth…your truth…you rise taller than the fragments of you ever could.
But only you can call your wholeness home.
Only you know what is true.
So tune out the voices and tune into your inner whisper.
Let it sing you home.
Follow its buzz. Faint at first, but growing louder each step closer you get.
Warmer…warmer…
Hold just a moment longer the words you receive, the messages you are sent about how to live and how to lead.
Test them against your wholeness.
Would integration be honest?
Would incorporation add sturdiness, robustness, strength?
If so, let them in.
If not, reject them and move forward.
Child - the world does not need more just like the others.
The world needs you.
Be a beacon with your aligned light.
Shine.
In integrity, shine.
Love this! Thank you for sharing about The Understory!
I loved the voice note! This topic comes up for me a lot- as I’ve gotten older, I think of integrity less in terms of morality or having good values (although that’s part of it) - but more in terms of having your insides match your outsides 🤪 honoring yourself & not bending the things you say or the actions you take to accommodate any external pressure.
Motherhood, marriage, social media and work can make this veryyyyyy tricky at times.